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Recently my friend Greg made reference to a blog called Stuff Christians Like that’s written by this guy Jon Acuff. I figured it would be pretty lame and stupid, but Greg’s sense of humor is a lot like mine (sarcastic even though we call it “witty”) so I subscribed to the RSS feed to see what all the fuss was about.

Stuff Christians Like takes one topic at a time and points out how Christians like that topic. It sounds really lame, I know, but it’s absolutely awesome.  Really.

Examples:

• Boycotting Stuff
• Forcing Little Kids to Sing the End of Your Song
• Testamints - Sending Bad Breath to Hell
• Letting Porn Win

Today is birthday #42 for former Braves’ pitcher Greg Maddux. Yesterday I watched him get career win 349 and watched in amazement at how smart of a pitcher he is. So with Greg’s awesomeness in my mind, and since it’s his birthday, I figured I’d share my Greg Maddux story.

It was 1996, the last year the Braves were in Fulton County Stadium. I was 18 years old. I had made the trip to Atlanta with a couple of friends and was watching Maddux pitch his regular bullpen session. In the old stadium, you could get really close to the pitchers in the bullpen, and I think I was about 15-20 feet from Maddux.

Some fat idiot was standing beside me and began talking very loudly about how awful it was that Maddux’s career had fallen apart. See, Maddux had a rough start to that year. He had an excellent ERA, but was getting on average about 2 runs per game support from the team. Smoltz, on the other hand, was getting about 5 runs per game. Apparently, the 2.72 ERA Maddux posted in 1996 meant that his career was over.

The guy wouldn’t shut up about it, and it really got me aggravated. I piped up and told the guy he was crazy. I told him that we were watching one of the smartest pitchers in the game. I pointed out how Maddux’s change of speed and location control dominates batters even though he doesn’t have overpowering stuff. I told the guy that even though Smoltz was having a good year, Maddux was still the better pitcher, and that he shouldn’t judge Greg by a win/loss record - especially when his team isn’t giving him any run support.

I went on and on (kind of like I’m doing now). I don’t remember all that I said, but I really gave the guy an earful. The guy finally shut up and walked away as Maddux was finishing his bullpen session. Greg made his final pitch, stepped off the mound to grab a towel. Then he looked up at me, smiled, and tipped his cap as if to say thanks for the support.

Hopefully in about a week, Maddux will win game #350. You can bet I’ll be watching that game. This week I found some links online talking about Greg. See here and here. The first is substantially longer than the second, but it’s about the best article on Maddux I’ve ever read.

Happy birthday, Greg! (Yes, Greg reads my blog…you doubted?)

Let there be much rejoicing in the land!  The Office is new again.  NBC 9pm.  Tonight.

If you need me in the 9:00 hour tonight, don’t bother calling.  I won’t answer.   (Yes, it’s a 30-minute show.  I’ll watch it twice.)

My last post, which provided a sneak peek at the new Diet Mt. Ron label prototypes, brought up several questions about this amazing new product. Instead of answering them in the comments of that post, I decided to put the answers here in their own post.

Tanya asks: Does that mean they’re sucking out your blood to make pop?
No. My awesomeness goes into the drink, not my blood. Putting blood in it would change the color to something other than the natural “awesome green” color. Though I suppose if we used some blood, we could do a “Code Red” type of product…

Allison asks: You do know that Gaines already patented this under his name, right?
Um, Diet Mt. Gaines? That would never work. May I suggest Diet Dr. Gaines instead? Dr. Pepper has needed an improvement for some time now…

Ethan asks: How do they extract that “little bit of extra awesomeness” from you to add to the new premier beverage of the diet soft drink world? Plasma transfusion? Colonic irrigation? Used kleenexes from your trash?
We tried plasma transfusion, but I don’t do needles. Colonic irrigation (which is even less pleasant than it sounds) worked, but I’m not willing to do that on a regular basis. Used Kleenexes from my trash give you much less awesomeness than you would ever imagine.

Ethan asks: When the awesomeness leaves you and heads for the bottling plant, do you get weaker?
If we did an invasive process, I would be less awesome for a short period of time. However, we use a process Sarah and I developed called A.W.E.S.O.M.E. (Automatic Wireless Extraction System to Obtain My Effervescence) that allows us to collect the awesomeness as it emanates from me. It’s pretty complex stuff…I’ll post more about A.W.E.S.O.M.E. later.

Ethan asks: How long does it take to come back up to full awesomeness?
We don’t harvest extra awesomeness from me, so my awesomometer is always full.

Ethan asks: Do you have special dietary requirements to keep your awesomeness levels up during a bottling cycle?
We have found that certain foods do help boost my awesome levels. For example, when my diet is high in pizza, we are able to increase production by nearly 20%. Mexican food, candy bars (specifically Butterfinger), ice cream, and BBQ pork are also among the foods that positively impact awesomeness collection levels.

Thanks for the great questions!

I’m very excited.  The prototype for the Diet Mt. Ron bottles arrived this week, and I thought I’d share it with you all.  No word yet on when it’ll be in stores…we’re still ironing out details.

I’ve ignored the blog a bit since my return from my annual Florida Spring Training trip. You may have noticed a general lull out on the internet. Yeah, that was me. Sorry.

I’ve got 17 (or so) posts floating in my head, but right now I really only have time for some random randomness.

• The 3 Yankees pitchers who all need to have a great season for the Yanks to be playing in October (Hughes, Chamberlain, and Kennedy) only make $1.2 million combined this year. For a $200ish million payroll, it seems like those 3 guys are underpaid. (or maybe some of the other guys are overpaid? Nah…) Source
• I bought The Weepies‘ “Say I Am You” as suggested by Geof, but it’s not grabbing me like he indicated it might. It’s ok, but it hasn’t floored me like I thought it would (not yet, anyway). Geof’s music recommendations are typically very solid…maybe my taste in good music is still developing…
• I just downloaded a free book (“The Man Who Was Thursday” by G. K. Chesterton) thanks to a tip from Richard. Thanks, man.
• Andy Osenga’s CCM announcement from earlier this week still has me laughing. 25 Ron Points to you, Mr. Osenga.
• I’ve been following an interesting discussion over at the Rabbit Room that included a brilliant post by Ron Block. One of these days, I’m going to get a chance to sit down with Ron Block and just talk about stuff. That guy amazes me, but with a name like Ron, you’d almost expect it.
• Diet Mt. Dew has been officially renamed “Diet Mt. Ron” in our office. The Mountain Ron tastes about the same as Mountain Dew, except you can tell there’s a little more awesome in there.

I’ll post something less random as soon as I can. Thanks for reading.

Google Analytics told me an alarming fact today. Nobody from Wyoming visits my blog. So today I’m reaching out to the fine folks of Wyoming. (If you’re wondering if this is a vain attempt to increase my blog readership, the answer is maybe.)

Here are some great bits of trivia about Wyoming:

• Anyone in Wyoming who fails to close a fence is subject to a fine up to $750. (and rightly so)
• Wyoming has the lowest population of all 50 states. (This may explain the lack of web traffic from Wyoming.)
• Residents of Cheyenne are not permitted to shower on Wednesdays
• Junk dealers in Wyoming are prohibited from doing business with someone who is drunk. (Who among us hasn’t regretted visiting a junk yard while inebriated?)
• From January through April, people in Wyoming are prohibited from taking a picture of a rabbit without a permit.
• Wyoming was the first state to allow women to vote. (Feminists.)

Ok, so I’m joking about the feminist comment. Seriously, I like Wyoming. I’ve never been, but I’m sure it’s great. For all you Wyomians (Wyomans? Wyomianites?), feel free to come around.  (If you could come on days when you’re allowed to shower, that’d be great.)

I mentioned it the other day…I’ve got a copy of Andrew Peterson’s “On the Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness” to give away.  I thought about how to (creatively) do this, and I think I’ve figured it out.

To be eligible to receive this book, you must meet the following criteria:

• You must have a basic working knowledge of the English language.
• You have a current, active blog.
• You agree to read the book and post a review of it on your blog.
• You agree to then give the book to someone else who meets this criteria.

My thought is that this may help create some buzz on the internet for a great book.  If you want to be included in this free book goodness, reply to this post (or email me, or tell me when you see me).  I’ll have a non-biased party randomly select the winner, and the winner’s name will be posted on the 18th (the book’s release date).

I got my copy of Andrew Peterson’s book in the mail yesterday.  What’s that you say?  It’s before the release date?  How did I manage to get an advance copy?

I’m excited to announce that moreron.com will be part of the Andrew Peterson blog tour.  That’s right, folks, I’m gonna read a book.

The review will go up the week that the book is released.  Until then, I’ve got to figure out a clever way to give away the 2nd copy of the book they sent.  (Yeah, I got 2 advance copies.  I must be special.)  One copy was for me, and the other copy is supposed to be given out through my web site.

Any ideas on clever ways to give away a book?

So here’s another reason (like you need another reason) to hate Red Sox fans.  Apparently a group of Red Sox fans beat a man wearing a Yankees hat, sending him to the hospital for treatment.

I’ve got 2 very good friends (Ethan, Bryan) who are Red Sox fans.  I’m convinced that they’re the only decent Sox fans in the history of the franchise.  So if you know them, don’t hate them.  But feel free to hate the rest of Red Sox Nation.

(Note to Ethan and Bryan: Be careful, guys.  That article said the attackers are described as being “white men.”  I know you fit that description, and I wouldn’t want you to have issues with the police.)